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Signs that a child or adult may be autistic

Autism presents differently in different people. The signs that people notice in children and adults are usually consistent with the core characteristics of autism, but this isn’t always obvious. For many autistic adults, signs were missed in their childhood. This page contains examples of common signs seen in autistic children and adults.

What we mean by signs

Autism presents differently in different people. There is no single way to appear or be autistic because all autistic people are unique, and for this reason there is no definitive sign or list of signs that can tell you whether you, your child or another person is autistic. 

This page includes a wide range of common signs that people have noticed in autistic children and adults. However, not every autistic person will show every sign. Autism is assessed by clinicians who gather information on multiple signs that must align with the core characteristics of autism in order for a diagnosis to be made. (You can find out more about this on our page Criteria and tools used for an autism assessment.)

Why can it be helpful to think about signs?

The only reliable way to find out whether someone is autistic is through an autism assessment. However, before deciding whether to pursue a diagnosis, or waiting for an assessment, it can be helpful to consider the signs you have noticed. For example: 

  • it may be useful to show a list of signs to a GP or another health care professional if you want to discuss a referral for an autism assessment with them, or as evidence to prepare for your assessment 
  • you may wish to talk to family, friends, partners or colleagues about what you have noticed 
  • if you think someone else is autistic and want to discuss this with them, it may be helpful to discuss the signs you have noticed 
  • you may wish to bring it up with a school, Further or Higher education institution, or at work, particularly to request support before seeking a diagnosis (a process that can take a long time).

Autistic people and families often describe a gradual process of ‘light bulb’ or ‘aha’ moments – noticing signs that led to them to consider whether they, their child or someone else might be autistic.
 

How do signs relate to the core characteristics of autism?

Autism is defined by ‘core characteristics’. These are described in medical literature as: 

  • social communication and social interaction differences 
  • restricted and repetitive behaviours and interests (RRBIs) – including potential sensory differences. 

For more information about the core characteristics of autism, visit our page What is autism? 

The core characteristics of autism must be present for a diagnosis to be made. However, before an autism assessment, people commonly notice the presence of certain signs in themselves or in others (children or adults) that may suggest they could be autistic. 

The signs that are noticed are usually consistent with the core characteristics of autism. However, it can be difficult to make this connection if you are not already familiar with autism. Stereotypes about autism can mean that it isn’t always easy to spot the signs of autism in someone who doesn’t fit the stereotype. 

Autistic people and their families have highlighted that spotting the signs of autism through the lens of the core characteristics (and diagnostic criteria) can be complicated for several reasons, including because: 

  • they are based on what other people can see and their interpretations of behaviour, which autistic people may not feel describes their experience 
  • they are written in medical language that can be hard to understand
  • people can misinterpret signs of autism as signs of something else, such as bad behaviour, academic giftedness or mental illness 
  • they don’t account for masking, where a person hides or suppresses their natural autistic characteristics 
  • they may not capture the co-occurrence of related conditions (for example, ADHD).

 

Signs related to the core characteristics

Social interaction and communication

A core characteristic of autism is social interaction and communication differences. Examples of signs that relate to this core characteristic include: 

  • limited, delayed, or no speech (including loss of language sometime after learning to speak and avoidance of talking, despite being able to) 
  • using repeated words and phrases (echolalia), made-up words, technical or very literal speech, pauses, and sophisticated or advanced language 
  • speaking in an unusual accent 
  • differences in rate of speech (fast/slow) and intonation (monotone/varied) 
  • using fewer gestures or facial expressions to communicate 
  • preferring not to make eye-contact or finding this uncomfortable 
  • finding it difficult to recognise or read body language or facial expressions
  • finding it hard to judge pauses, turn-taking, or to be interrupted during conversations 
  • being confused by metaphors and idioms, not always understanding hidden meanings or inference and taking phrases literally 
  • not engaging in a two-way conversation (for example, not asking other people questions about themselves) 
  • mismatching non-verbal and verbal communication (for example, saying they are feeling an emotion, but with body language that doesn't appear to align with that emotion) 
  • seems less aware of others around them – for example, they might not respond to their name being called 
  • autistic babies and toddlers may not smile when smiled at by others or point when they want to show others something or find something interesting 
  • find following ‘social rules’ confusing 
  • talking in depth about their own interests, but not engaging in others’ interests 
  • being direct and honest in communicating opinions (often more direct and honest than people expect; for example, saying they don’t like something when they might have been expected to tell a 'polite' lie) 
  • difficulty telling the difference between someone being friendly or joking and someone trying to bully or hurt their feelings
  • difficulty imagining experiences they have never had 
  • having a clear idea of right and wrong, and a strong sense of justice, but may struggle with grey areas or unclear rules.


Restricted and repetitive behaviours and interests (RRBIs)

A core characteristic of autism is restricted and repetitive behaviours and interests (RRBIs). Many autistic people prefer to call these ‘self-soothing’ or ‘self-regulating’ activities. Examples of signs that relate to this core characteristic include: 

  • a strong preference for routine
  • distress when a routine changes 
  • enjoying order and benefiting from clearly defined rules
  • making repetitive movements when excited or upset, for example flapping hands, or making the same noise repeatedly
  • using repetitive behaviours as a way of staying calm
  • having strong passions and dedicated interests (sometimes known as ‘special interests’) for specific subjects/hobbies, that you/they can engage with intensely
  • find engaging in their passions and dedicated interests calming and soothing
  • finding it easy to focus on specific interests, but also find it difficult to disengage and move on to other tasks.
     

Sensory differences

Sensory differences are considered part of the core characteristic restricted and repetitive behaviours and interests (RRBIs), because the sensory difference may be expressed in sensory seeking or sensory avoidant behaviour that may appear restricted and/or repetitive. 

Examples of signs that relate to sensory differences include: 

  • being much more or much less sensitive to visual stimuli, sounds, smells or touch than other people
  • seeking out sensory inputs, including visuals, sounds, smells or tactile stimuli and using them as a comfort 
  • showing strong distress, aversion or actively avoiding sources of sensory difficulty
  • finding certain sounds, smells, feelings or foods particularly calming or enjoyable, such as coloured lights or being tucked tightly into bed.

 

Anxiety and distressed behaviour signs

All the signs listed in the sections above can potentially lead to high levels of anxiety and may result in: 

  • distressed behaviour that may present as aggression (towards yourself/themselves or others)
  • overwhelm and/or meltdowns – potentially from masking in social situations and needing to release the stress of doing so after returning to a ‘safe space’
  • difficulties in school/workplace
  • appearing withdrawn or finding it difficult to engage with when recovering from social situations (sometimes known as ‘shutdown)’ 
  • being misunderstood by others 
  • reaching a point of breakdown, severe mental health difficulties or burnout.

 

Other signs that a person may be autistic

Many autistic people report feeling different from other people of the same or similar age. These are some of the ways they may feel different: 

  • struggling with things that peers don’t (for example, socialising or daily tasks)
  • experiencing things differently from peers
  • feeling like an 'alien' and/or they don't fit in with other people
  • having to put effort into behaviours that others seem to do automatically (for example, forcing yourself/themselves to make eye contact)
  • completing tasks in unusual or creative ways
  • using coping strategies to make it through the day
  • being excluded, bullied, or not fitting in with others
  • finding it difficult to have meaningful relationships with people
  • finding it more difficult than most to answer interview questions, write CVs/applications and find employment.

Making sense of things

Autistic people often feel they can’t make sense of certain situations or themselves. This can include: 

  • feeling they don’t understand how the world works
  • not understanding the purpose of some typical social events
  • not understanding their own identity or knowing who they are (this may be due to masking)
  • confusion when there is a lack of structure. 

A sense of being overwhelmed

A feeling shared by some autistic people is that of being overwhelmed, which can mean everyday tasks can become challenging. This sense of being overwhelmed may include:  

  • feeling overwhelmed by anxiety or anger and having difficulty keeping calm in stressful situations
  • experiencing distress or panic
  • having difficulty transitioning between classes, schools and further education
  • having difficulty engaging with school or being unable to attend school full time
  • having difficulty remaining in employment due to problems maintaining relationships with colleagues and managers or because some workplaces or offices can be overwhelming environments
  • struggling with self-harm or suicidal ideation
  • feeling lonely and isolated
  • struggling with everyday tasks, such as cooking, cleaning, self-care, finances and life admin. 

Being misunderstood by others

Other people may also appear to misunderstand autistic people. Indications of being misunderstood include: 

  • being regarded as a ‘difficult’ student or employee because you/they do not comply with others’ requests or have difficulty engaging
  • underachieving in education or in employment compared to what you/they appear to be capable of
  • unable to achieve qualifications from school or in Further or Higher education
  • being labelled as gifted, sensitive or shy
  • mental health diagnoses don’t fully explain your/their experiences
  • mental health services/treatment have been ineffective.


Recognising the signs that a child or young person may be autistic

Parents or carers are often the first to notice the signs that their child or young person may be autistic, but it can also be other family members, friends, or education and health professionals.  

You may notice that your child: 

  • responds differently than other children (for example, responding to their name; responding to sensory stimuli such as light, sound, taste and touch) 
  • doesn’t engage with other children 
  • has additional characteristics (for example, hyperactivity) that were investigated 
  • loses a skill they once had (for example, loss of speech that had previously developed) 
  • experiences challenges in school
  • has mental health issues. 

Additionally, parents may recognise their family and child’s experience reflected in media about autism (such as books and YouTube videos). 

Be aware that not all information and media about autism is reliable and evidence based. You should be particularly wary of any source that talks about how to ‘cure’ or ‘treat’ autism, which is not possible and so the source is likely to be unreliable. Read more about this issue on our Strategies and interventions page.​​

Recognising the signs that an adult or teenager may be autistic

Many autistic adults are the first to notice signs that they may be autistic, though it is also common for other family members to notice first. Because autism is a lifelong developmental difference, or neurodivergence, autistic adults were also autistic as children, however, the signs that they were autistic may have been missed in childhood. 

Many autistic adults do not see a difference between the autistic characteristics they experienced as a child and as an adult. For this reason, adults should also consider the signs detailed above in the section Recognising the signs that a child or young person may be autistic, as these signs may reflect their childhood experience, even if those signs weren’t noticed when they were a child. 

Some autistic people use a strategy called masking to consciously or unconsciously hide or suppress their autistic traits. This may mean is it harder for others to tell they are autistic. 

In addition to the signs that may be apparent in childhood, general signs in adults include: 

  • relating to or recognise themselves in media (such as books and YouTube videos) about autism and/or by autistic content creators
  • having reached a point of breakdown, severe mental health difficulties or burnout.

Experiences of parents and autistic adults

Parent experiences of their children 

"Up until two and half his speech was developing, he was definitely talking and making words and eye contact … and then suddenly … there was a plateau and then a regression. … He had major issues with lack of fear, which basically meant danger to himself … he would jump from high things; … he would make eye contact with adults, but not with his peers; … he's not interested in his peers." 

– Dani, How our second child was diagnosed with autism

"In our 2 year old daughter, we noticed hair pulling/twirling; lining up objects; spinning; hanging upside down; rocking herself; toe walking; hates having hair washed, dried, brushed … doesn't like getting dressed either; doesn't like making eye contact; like to unpack and repack constantly; hand flapping and shuddering; she likes to hide behind and in things; she doesn't like to get 'mess' on her hands and body parts (including clothes and shoes)…"

– Mrs Henderson, Early autism signs in our daughter - 2 years old 

"I remember vividly, noticing that James seemed unaware of the appropriate distance to stand behind his future classmate in the line. ... He was loud but didn’t like loud noises – he found hand dryers so terrifying that we had bought him … precautionary ear defenders … He was a terrible sleeper, needing me to lay with him at night, sometimes for hours to help him drift off."

– Louise, Stories from the Spectrum: James and Louise Williams

"One of the main signs that we noticed with our 3 year old daughter was a 'stimming' or repetitive behaviour where she would take her blanket it and wiggle it beneath her nose repetitively and then if she was really upset she would breathe rhythmically while brushing it under her nose … to sooth herself and calm down and she does this multiple times a day … since she was about 18 months."

– Dani, Autism signs we noticed in our two-year-old

Autistic adults on their experiences as children and young people

"As a child, I felt different from my classmates and other children. ... I was more interested in interacting with adults than my peers. Adults could answer my questions knowledgeably and patiently. I also liked reading, which is not in my family’s DNA. When kids my age were playing outside with their peers, I preferred to stay home reading a book. I was fascinated with astronomy and mathematics."
 
– Juliani Kusmanto, On being Autistic and of Asian Descent

"A super common trait … is being labelled 'gifted', 'sensitive' or 'shy', or all three…; losing sleep over group projects or social games, like in PE…; really enjoying time alone in my room…; frequent sickness or pain…; confusion about birthday parties … I don't really like big group gatherings…; wanting to eat the same thing every single day…; difficulty navigating peer relationships … and difficulty having people in my space…; creating systems of organisation…; preferring visual learning over auditory learning…; preferring to interact with my teachers over my peers."
 
– Taylor Heaton, Ten childhood autistic traits that make sense now 

"I showed some autistic traits from a very young age. For example, seeing other children and freezing. When I started primary school (aged four), I could not sit in the lunch hall because it was too noisy and busy (I was also a very slow eater, which didn’t help!). I used to eat my lunch in my classroom with the teacher. During my first ever parents’ evening, my class teacher asked my parents if I could speak. They were shocked by this because I spoke all the time at home, but I never spoke a word during my first year at primary school."

– Georgie, My autism diagnosis 

"It wasn't until I was a teenager that I got diagnosed. When I was 13 or 14 I was so depressed that I saw a psychologist, and that’s how it all started. At the time I was severely depressed and I go diagnosed with depression. … I had an eating disorder. I had self-harming behaviour. … I struggled a lot with understanding the world. I struggled with school and relationships, and I also struggled a lot with my family." 

– Saga Johanna, My autism diagnosis story 

Autistic adults’ experiences in adulthood

"To the casual observer I am perhaps not noticeably different from anybody else. But they do not know that I've listened to the same CD ... in my car on a loop for 7 months; that I get too anxious to function if I don't have a routine or that I get really upset when an existing routine is interrupted; ... that too much stress or sensory input can lead to me having huge emotional meltdowns."

– Rachael, Diagnosed with autism as an adult

"When I saw what autism looked like in real life, not just the medical definition, suddenly it was something that I could immensely relate to. ... When you've spent your whole life not being believed, to finally find people and a community that do believe you and do validate you, and to say crazy things like 'I understand', it’s absolutely life changing."
 
– Paul Micallef, How to tell if you're on the autism spectrum

"When I look back on my childhood and teenage years, I mostly remember loneliness. It was like everyone existed on the other side of a glass wall. I could see them, but I couldn't fully understand the life they experienced on their side of the wall. They had their own challenges, I'm sure, but life seemed to make sense to them in a way it never had for me. My diagnosis made me feel more human than ever. It meant I wasn't an alien. This was the closest to a happy ending I could imagine, as if a map had been placed in front of me with roads I had never seen before."
 
– Rebecca, I got diagnosed with autism at 28 years old

"I am social and chatty, present podcasts and can give public talks. Unlike many autistic people, I also have no problems making eye contact. Behind the scenes, however, is where the pain and difficulties of having autism reveals itself. I have difficulty feigning interest in a topic I don't care about and am terrible at small talk, often an important part of getting to know people. This has sometimes caused isolation and feelings of intense loneliness and rejection."
 
– Sue, Autism: I was diagnosed at 60

Links, resources and article sources

Related advice and support

Deciding whether to seek an autism assessment

Read more

How to request an autism assessment

Read more

How to bring up that you think someone may be autistic

Read more

Related videos
 

Dr Sarah Lister Brook. Clinical Director, National Autistic Society

Expert Q&A with Dr Sarah Lister Brook

Our Clinical Director answers common questions about autism assessment and diagnosis in this YouTube playlist.

View on YouTube

My diagnosis story: Finty

Our Young Ambassador shares her experience of autism assessment and diagnosis.

Watch the video

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Autism Services Directory

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